Love my woman, love my baby, love my biscuits sopped in gravy.

Monday, January 16, 2006

On Flavored Toothpastes

We spent the other night out of town with some family, and forgot the toothpaste. It was not a problem really, because as it turns out, our two year old has recently graduated from some Gerber apple flavored toothpaste to a huge container of bubble gum flavored stuff that carried pictures of the Disney Princesses. Yes, it is amazing they have their own toothpaste, but that's just a drop in the bucket. Any kind of merchandise that a girl under the age of ten would use or borrow has a Disney Princess version. There are clothes, of course, but also shoes, sleeping bags, tents, balls, bikes, and chapstick. It's the perfect ploy to get in your wallet, and it works.

While I was brushing my teeth with the pink, foamy, blow-gum-flavored paste, it crossed my mind that maybe there should be more of this for people over the age of ten. Of course, Elvis is well merchandised, but I have to admit I haven't seen much Elvis toothpaste. I would probably give that a try if they made it, curious if it was going to be blue suede or peanut butter and nanner flavored.

I'm also a fan of the Charlie Daniels Band. What if Charlie put out a toothpaste? I think he could get a deal with Copenhagen or Skoal, who could balance out their reputation of ruining teeth by selling nicotine laced toothpaste. Brushing would be fun and addictive.

Pizza might be a good toothpaste flavor, and could be marketed under the Domino's brand. They could have it come out of the tube in little round balls the same shape as their sausage. Coffee toothpaste would be good for those who don't want to lose that flavor in the morning and it could contain caffeine. For bedtime a vanilla ice cream flavored toothpaste might hit the spot.

These oddball flavors could really take off. Who would have thought that bubble gum flavored toothpaste would be a hit? It's not that great of a flavor, but the kids like it. To be honest I was a bit surprised when Snow White on the tube produced the bubble gum flavor, because I don't recall her spitting her gum down the well while she was singing with the birds and the midgets. Given her history, I was kind of hoping for a Poison Apple flavor.


Blogger Gibbytron said...

A new blog. I am impressed...

12:35 AM, January 20, 2006  

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